unedited for 100 days. Day 46

I'm just in this mood right now. I think it's a good one, although some might argue that if taken too far it could be self destructive. I suppose it depends on what you're into. As much as I love the way we have learned (in very general terms) what is good for us and what isn't, I equally feel as though the suggestions that are made around how we should be living our lives can feel quite crippling. I love research and I'm all about staying up to date on the studies that are being done in the health and fitness realm specifically. However, the conclusions that are drawn from years and pages of research can be quite misleading and even sometimes downright backwards. We are now being told exactly how much water to drink, exactly how much alcohol is okay, how much red meat to eat, how many minutes of cardio we need to do each day, how many hours of sleep we need each night and you know, the list goes on and on and on. The mood I'm in lately, is this. Do whatever makes you happy. Like deeply, truly and wildly happy. Our spirits weren't built to calculate each day the way they are suggesting. Additionally, I'm done 'over-thinking' my decisions as a mother. If you are plugged into the narrow and overpowering spiral of parental advice- you know that it has you questioning every choice you make. All of this information coming at us draws us further and further away from our natural instincts. The should and shouldn'ts of life are paralyzing. The mood I'm in right now, reminds me that ultimately I go to rest with my choices and if at the end of the day they sit well with me, then screw the research.

unedited for 100 days. Day 46

unedited for 100 days. Day 45

We recently were able to move back home, after a 7 month temporary stay in an apartment while our home underwent water damage remediation and remodeling. Just last Thursday we had our first night back in our home, and in a strange way we have settled back into our normal routines like nothing happened. In many other ways, like garage chaos and newly settled layers of dust to discover every day, I am reminded that we have a lot of integrating to do. It's no surprise either, that my husband and I became sick over the weekend. We called it the 'let down'. It's that feeling of falling into your own bed at the end of the day, finally able to give in to your tired feet and feel all the emotions of the day. In this case, it's not that our feet were tired, but instead our minds. The mental exhaustion of a remodel is real! As exciting as it all is, at minimum it is like taking on a part time job (that you don't get paid for). This week, I am reminded of the importance of giving in to the so-called 'let down'. There are times when we have no choice but to operate on adrenaline. Equally there are times when we seem to start and end each day in auto pilot. Perhaps the most important thing we can do from time to time, is give in and surrender to whatever is, fully experiencing our thoughts, emotions and our bodies. Whether times are good or bad. Easy or hard. Maybe it can't be defined at all. A time-out every now and then offers us space to observe where we are at, to gather information to help guide where we are going next. For me currently, I know I am thrilled to finally be home, but I'm also digesting, reflecting and mindlessly spacing out on my favorite couch with no agenda at all. There is plenty to do, but somehow it feels right to make time to do nothing at all.

unedited for 100 days. Day 44

The other day, a five year old attended my yoga class with her mother. They arrived one or two minutes after I had started the class so I was not able to meet the little girl beforehand. Without any hesitation, the mom laid down her daughters mat in the the front row, with her own mat in row two. I admit that at first, I was skeptical. How could such an adorable and young little girl hang in this class, for an entire sixty minutes. It didn't take long to realize she knew her way around a vinyasa. I found myself unable to keep a smile off of my face when I made eye contact with her. She was radiating joy throughout the whole class. She followed along as good as anyone, and every time she pressed up into her upward facing dog, she closed her eyes and took a long pause. I couldn't help but wonder if I have ever practiced with such freedom and confidence. After class I found out that she practices yoga at home with her mom and that she loves it. I complimented the mom for giving her daughter a space of her own. Not once did the mom lean in to correct her or guide her.  I know I speak for everyone else in class that day, that our sweet little kindergarden spring breaker reminded us to not take ourselves too seriously and to own the front row when/if we've landed there.

unedited for 100 days. Day 43

Meeting new girlfriends is challenging and every bit as awkward as real dating. By now, most ladies have a couple to a few really close friends set in place, which seems to be plenty when your gal pal time is limited to one girls night a month (if that). Keeping up with your besties can feel challenging enough, although thank the social gods for Marco Polo- which I use daily. Game changer! As much as I wanted to resist the common culprit of changing and shifting friend groups, I admit that it is an inevitable truth. If and when you have kids, it tends to have a major impact on your schedule, priorities and conversation topics. Even an age difference of six months can kill off a simple coffee date because of nap schedules or bedtimes.  Despite these set backs, I refuse to let my favorite women slip out of my fingers by planning months ahead. It feels ridiculous to plan a summer walk with a friend in the dead of winter, but I think we are all on the same page so it's a mutual ridiculous task. To my closest friends, I love you with all my heart but I am officially on the market for other mamas that share a similar schedule and a need for some stroller walks, park dates and diaper talk. I remember being highly encouraged to join PEPS and now I see what I missed out on. It's taken over a year, but I think I have finally allowed myself to identify with my new title. I'm not only a mom and it is so important to me that I maintain my sense of self and contribution through these next 17 years, or 99 years... however long it takes. But I won't deny that being a mom is a big part of who I am now. And I need some other mom friends to hangout with on a Tuesday at 9am so that we can swap underwhelming stories about our overwhelming children. I love white wine with lunch and long walks on the beach, so if you know of anyone.....

unedited for 100 days. Day 42

There is a common misconception on how to work out your butt. For decades we have been commanded to "squeeze" the butt at the top of every squat, lunge, bridge, or any lower body exercise we do in attempt to strengthen and tone the buttox. The truth though, is that what you do at the top of these moves has little to zero effect on utilizing the glute muscles. What we should be paying attention to is what we are doing with our pelvis, thigh bones and sit-bones on the way down of the movement. Cueing people to 'squeeze their butt' is open to interpretation, and of course most us respond with the action of pinching our cheeks together, which again, will do nothing for the aesthetics of your butt or the recruitment of these muscles. Perhaps it would help if we start by clarifying the difference of butt cheeks and glutes. Butt cheeks are superficial (like literally on the surface of your body) and glutes are connected to the anatomy of the pelvis and thigh bones. If we can start to connect how we articulate our pelvis in our squats and lunges this will be much more effective than the confusing and overused cue of 'squeeze your butt'. When you are operating the movement of a classic squat, try focusing on the action of rotating your pelvis back (like pointing your tailbone to the wall behind you- not down), as well as energetically drawing the sit bones towards one another while pulling your thigh bones back and apart. If I just lost you, keep it simple and just focus on stretching the smile line as you lower down in the squat. (Smile line is bottom of the butt cheek and top of the hamstring). It's important that we understand that in order to fully recruit the muscle fibers of any body mechanic, we must lengthen. This is why you will often hear the term "full range of motion" in a strength training session or class. I think the confusion lies in not knowing how to access a stretch of the glutes at the bottom of a squat or lunge. In attempt to avoid overcomplicating this blog post, I encourage everyone to work on understanding three things: anterior and posterior tilt of the pelvis, interior and external rotation of the femoral head and the anatomical location of your sit-bones. To access a stretch of the posterior chain (think glutes and hamstrings), remember the three cues while descending in a squat. 1. Rotate pelvis back (anterior tilt of the pelvis), 2. internal rotation of the femoral head and 3. imagine touching the sit bones together. The more you practice, the more you can rely on muscle memory to do the work for you, as well as the ability to apply this action to other lower body exercises. If none of this makes sense, at least we can start with this. Let's stop over squeezing our butt cheeks, this can have unwanted long term effects or even acute injury to the low back, and also frustrate a loyal squatter who doesn't seem to be getting any of the desired results (like a higher butt!) Happy to answer any questions!

unedited for 100 days. Day 41

Everyone is talking about slowing down and being present. The trouble lies in not knowing how to do this. It's natural to be present when we are doing something we enjoy, like playing in the ocean or maybe hiking in the woods. It's much more challenging to be present during times that challenge our comfort level, or maybe our tolerance in general. By now we all know that deep breathing helps, but if that's not working try scanning through the five senses. For a moment, notice what you feel in your body, what you see, what you smell, what you hear and what you taste. This is an easy enough exercise to use anytime to bring your awareness to the present moment. The idea of being present is not to make you instantly happy or joyful. It's more about cultivating a sense of peace, giving in to whatever experience we may be facing with the understanding that so much of what we experience is out of our control. When we are present we gain more clarity and more control over how we choose to react and respond to the world around us, ultimately leading to more peace at the end of the day.